Friday, September 21, 2012

Where We Started

G and I always knew that we wanted to have kids.  G has two sisters and they have 5 children.  We have them a lot and enjoy being Aunts.  Like I said earlier we knew that there were ways we could still have babies and we were sure that it wouldn't be hard.  My friend had 4 IUIs and got pregnant 3 times one was a miscarriage but she has 2 beautiful girls.  So I thought "well then how hard can it be?"  I thought it would take maybe 3 IUIs at most!  I guess I should probably explain what IUIs are and more on the fertility process for some who might be new at this or for you lucky people that never have to go through all this!

IUI - Intrauterine insemination - is performed by threading a very thin flexible catheter through the cervix and injecting washed sperm directly into the uterus.

Other Acronyms you will see in my blog:

BFN - Big Fat Negative

BFP - Big Fat Positive

Ok with some of that explained (there will be a lot more) maybe you wont be so confused!  We are able to do IUIs because you can buy donor sperm...obviously G and I don't have our own sperm. lol  And guess where you can buy it?....Yes the internet!  I am sure you are not surprised since you can pretty much buy anything on there! 

So we had discussed doing this for a long time but Summer 2010 is when we started getting serious about it.  Our relationship was great and G had moved in with me.  Since we couldn't legally get married we thought our next logical step was to start our family.  So I talked to my family doctor who I love.  She had to see a specialist to get pregnant with her twin boys and she had one patient who had a baby by donor sperm so when she gave me a referral for a fertility specialist (Dr G) I was again sure it was going to be easy!  Over the years, I have had trouble with my periods etc and had lots of tests done, but they could never find out what was wrong.  The docs told me I would probably have to see a specialist to get pregnant (that was of course before I was with a woman).  My hopes were still high thinking that all I needed was some fertility drugs and the IUI and everything would work out fine.  I figured I probably don't ovulate on my own but with the meds and the timing with the IUI I would have no trouble.  As you will soon find out that is not the case =(

So G and I talked it over and scheduled an appt with Dr G for November 2010.  She was very nice and told us what our options were, gave us information on sperm banks, and had me schedule a hysterosalpingogram (HSG).  The HSG is a special xray with dye to make sure my tubes were open.  That was scheduled for December.  G was very sick so her sister agreed to go with me.  It was raining really hard and we were late....the day just kept getting better and better.  I was sure, as we were running into the hospital getting soaked, that they would tell me I would have to reschedule.  (I tend to think negatively and I am trying to work on that!!)  But they checked me in and sent me to where I needed to go.  The nurse asked me a lot of questions and was very surprise I was there when my partner was a woman.  So I explained to her about donor sperm and IUI.  I was shocked she hadn't seen other woman like me but maybe she was new in that department! lol Anyways it was a male doctor who didn't speak good English so I suddenly got very nervous.  I had always had female doctors and Dr. G is female as well.  He explained what was going to happen...very little I was able to understand.  It wasn't awful but it was definitely painful and I got faint when the doctor had me sit up right away.  I tried to tell him but he wasn't understanding me but thank god the nurse did (the table I was on was very high and it would have been a long painful fall).  I asked the nurse what the doctor had said since I didn't understand and was feeling faint when he was telling me how it went.  She told me my tubes were clear and they didn't see any problems. 

The next thing G and I did was try to pick a sperm bank and a donor.  Man is that a task.  There are many sperm banks and then there are many donors.  We picked a sperm bank Fairfax.  Then sat down and decided what features we wanted.  I went through all the donors that met that criteria and looked through their medical history and narrowed it down from there.  It feels like you are picking the "perfect" mate.  Its weird and exciting at the same time.  I had it down to 3 so we bought their baby pics and I printed out all the information so we could really think about it.  I asked my friends and they got just as excited. lol It all was still new and exciting so it was actually fun to talk and think about.  After a few weeks we finally picked number 4034 a brown haired green eyed man with a degree in business management.  We hadn't looked at price while deciding and of course he was the most expensive because he was an ID donor (child can contact donor when 18 if he or she wishes).  But we just went with it.....we didn't want to pick a "cheap" donor! lol  His sperm would cost 900 dollars for our first IUI. Ekkk!

1 comment:

  1. As an adoptee I have to say, good on you for getting a donor that has the ID option. That's an amazing choice to have.